A Letter to my Husband
I don't know about you, but I always look back. I look back to try and pinpoint the precise moment that changed the course of my day, week, life. These moments are sometimes big and glaringly obvious and others can be presented as tiny forks in the road of your life and you don't realise it until much later that they have sent you down the road to where you stand today. In my mind, the moment (on reflection, this was one of those big and obvious moments) that shifted the course of my life towards you, towards us; happened that night in October.
It was nearly dusk and the air was warm as I made my way towards the crowded park. The Chinese lanterns glowed pink and red along the pathway leading to the blustering fountain where the paths moved off to an arc of destinations. I waited at our agreed meeting place and glanced up nervously every few moments to scan the crowds of faces looking for you.
And then you were there in front of me as the light faded to the west. You were smiling. Handsome.
But that night in the park, people were everywhere talking and laughing. It was all too loud and vibrant and I wanted to kidnap you away. I wanted to sit with you in a corner of a dark bar with a glass of red wine and listen to your deep voice. I wanted to watch the way your fine, pale wrists turned as you regaled me with your stories while I laughed and laughed. You always made me laugh.
Together we decided to move towards the quieter streets where we got lost in the dingy back lanes of Darlinghurst looking for the bar I wanted to go to. We went around in circles until we finally found the hidden doorway.
We sat and talked in the shadows, your knee pressed against mine while the dark night settled around us. I thought I caught a glimpse of something between us that night. A moment or two (or three or four) of connection and that perhaps, just perhaps; it could possibly be the beginning of something important. Something big. Something special.
Later, much later, the wind finally cooled and the clock edged towards midnight as we fumbled with bags, jackets and I kicked invisible pebbles on the pavement as we hesitated with our goodbyes. We finally came to the same silent conclusion and kissed each other lightly on the cheek before I made my way across the road to a waiting taxi. I haven't told you this, but that night my heart beamed and shifted with happiness the whole way home.
Looking back at that night, my love (my now husband), I believe that it was the special beginning of the story of us. A story, I know, I will be so very excited to look back on for the rest of my days.
Love, me xo