Fighting The Funk
I’ve been in a bit of funk for the past few weeks. Not for any one thing in particular, nor for no reason at all. Just a bunch of little-but-also-big-enough-reasons that have been swirling around my brain like a hive of angry bees. It hasn’t been fun wrestling with this funk and it also hasn’t helped that my inner critic has been particularly vocal for allowing life to get to me in the way it has. It’s funny how we can be our own worst enemy isn’t it? It has made me wonder Have I been looking after myself? Have I been forgiving, gentle and as kind as I would be to a close friend? I didn’t know what the answer was to feeling better but I did know a good way of showing myself a little love.
I meditated. I ran a hot bath, I dropped in the Diptyque bath oil and poured a glass of wine. I went to yoga where I stretched and turned until the endorphins leached into my bloodstream and I giddily walked home at half the pace I normally would. Mindful. Gentle. I confided in a few, not wanting to make a fuss. I let them hold my hand and look after me in the kindest ways they knew how - for which I am eternally grateful. I drove two hours into the countryside to spend time with my Mum. We talked for hours as we meandered along the deserted pine forest trails while the warm rain fell upon our faces. There were furry horse necks to cuddle as they eagerly sniffed my back pockets searching for sugary treats and a happy Labradoodle to lean into as I sat on the back deck watching the sun go down. There was my favourite childhood meal on the table, soft cotton sheets, breakfast in bed and my husband’s lovely face waiting for me when I returned home.
Slowly, I have begun to find a sense of peace. It hasn’t come easy and it didn’t happen overnight and there are still some rough moments. As Aristotle said happiness depends upon ourselves and it was (and is) hard work. The most important thing that I have learnt is that allowing myself a few simple acts of kindness, relaxing into the gentle passing of time and concentrating on the softening of my inner critic has gone a very long way in fighting this freaking funk.
So tell me - how do you show yourself the kindness that you deserve?